<< 2003-12-23 | 10:25 p.m. >>
you know, i shouldn't be upset. it doesn't do well to be upset. But i am. and maybe i shouldn't be, cu maybe to everyone else it's stupid. but to me...it's like alot of crap basically piled up until it's ready to fall over. I dunno.
my mom had a bad day. I worked. simple enough right? my mom told my grandpa to come over christmas eve becuase he practically invited himself over. so, she was kind of upset. ok. dad picked me up and we ate, then i told him i wanted to go and get something to wear for christmas. granted, it's christmas eve and not a very good time to go, but whatever, it's important to me. but mom, being in a bad mood and then finding this out, got all bent out of shape because she said it was a stupid time to go and whatever. but fuck it, i want a dress, even if i don't have the shoes to go with it. sooooo, i got all angry and words were siad, then she said she wished i would stop dresing like a boy. which i don't really, i juss like pants and looking like the individual i am, not who she wants me to be. it really cut me deep when she said that. i am 20, i don't need to be treated like i am 2. she tried to apologize, but i refused it. why did i do this? it's stupid to not accept it, but i can't stand living here. i need to explore MY LIFE, not have her complain that i am frumpy and ugly and a boy and whatever the fuck she thinks i am. no, i am no model, but at least i am not like...completely hideous to look at. i am an adult, yet she thinks i am still a baby, and she has the right to yell at me like one.
i can't take anymore. i am hoping with all my powers and prayers and strength to get money and get the hell out of here. life is just too short for this.
be sorted @ nimbo.net